But A wise man once said once said that you should never believe a thing simply because you want to believe it....tyrion lannister, got, 2017
For so long now I have believed that life is something that doesn't just happen to you. That we make choices: our response to circumstances determining as much of our happiness as the situation itself.
Yes, life is challenging. Often frustrating. At times, life is actually baffling. It is easy to get lost asking why. Why do things happen the way they often do? It would be so easy to tie myself up stewing over the facts: that death has touched me and those around me; that people are often petty and cruel; that adulthood is fairly thankless at times. There are many reasons why I, and likely everyone, could become bitter.
So, I look in the mirror and I ask myself: what do you want to believe? Some days it is harder to find an answer. I believe I want to insert kindness into my day. That there's more than enough of the negative. That there has to be balance out there and I can give that. I believe despite the fears I stare down daily that it is going to be okay.
Its not easy. It would be easy to say- I've been dealt a crappy hand of cards and I am just going throw them down and refuse to play. There's no win in that. I could cling to that truth and be sad....and say, but its true!!! I won't. I refuse. Its the kind of truth that only leads to despair. I just don't have time for that.
I look inside and try to drum up a better truth to attach to my soul. Not a greeting card platitude but a macro belief to guide me. So I look to the examples set by those wonderful people who grace my life. My friend Susan who always found a way to rejoice in her life. Her happiness was infectious. Was her life perfect? No. She faced bullying, I witnessed that. She overcame a bad marriage. She even found it in her to celebrate her emancipation from that. She stared death in the face and still took time to spread joy in those around her.
My friend Ramona: also an inspiration. She reminds me daily that life is a choice or series of choices. She has reshaped her career to reflect what she wants life to be. She has gone from being ground down and whittled away in the workplace to putting light into the world. Her work, as a life coach, now empowers so many others to choose to be the things the want to see in the world. She reminds me that the universe, if you ask for help, will work to put you in the place you need.
My children as well, who keep stepping forward to grasp any issue that is thrown their way, give me hope. Whether it is illness, grief, the miserable bullies that we find, or just the daily challenges...work, homework, relationships, their direction in life. Each one of them meets each obstacle with integrity. They overcome and beat the odds at an alarming rate. It's comforting and fills me with wonder.
It would be very small of me to ignore the beauty of the people who have been given to me to love. If I was to say, it is just so hard, I can't continue, wouldn't I be a silly git? If I was to become jaded and throw up my hands and say, there's nothing I can do-that would be a lie.
So I choose. I choose to try. I choose to find a way to put aside my annoyances, my fears, my hurts. I choose to be welcoming, positive and gracious. Even when it hurts. Even when I would rather retreat. Even when I feel the deck is stacked and the odds unlikely.
What do I choose to believe? Nothing major. No giant world view. Just one small hope: That I can step forward and try.
For so long now I have believed that life is something that doesn't just happen to you. That we make choices: our response to circumstances determining as much of our happiness as the situation itself.
Yes, life is challenging. Often frustrating. At times, life is actually baffling. It is easy to get lost asking why. Why do things happen the way they often do? It would be so easy to tie myself up stewing over the facts: that death has touched me and those around me; that people are often petty and cruel; that adulthood is fairly thankless at times. There are many reasons why I, and likely everyone, could become bitter.
So, I look in the mirror and I ask myself: what do you want to believe? Some days it is harder to find an answer. I believe I want to insert kindness into my day. That there's more than enough of the negative. That there has to be balance out there and I can give that. I believe despite the fears I stare down daily that it is going to be okay.
Its not easy. It would be easy to say- I've been dealt a crappy hand of cards and I am just going throw them down and refuse to play. There's no win in that. I could cling to that truth and be sad....and say, but its true!!! I won't. I refuse. Its the kind of truth that only leads to despair. I just don't have time for that.
I look inside and try to drum up a better truth to attach to my soul. Not a greeting card platitude but a macro belief to guide me. So I look to the examples set by those wonderful people who grace my life. My friend Susan who always found a way to rejoice in her life. Her happiness was infectious. Was her life perfect? No. She faced bullying, I witnessed that. She overcame a bad marriage. She even found it in her to celebrate her emancipation from that. She stared death in the face and still took time to spread joy in those around her.
My friend Ramona: also an inspiration. She reminds me daily that life is a choice or series of choices. She has reshaped her career to reflect what she wants life to be. She has gone from being ground down and whittled away in the workplace to putting light into the world. Her work, as a life coach, now empowers so many others to choose to be the things the want to see in the world. She reminds me that the universe, if you ask for help, will work to put you in the place you need.
My children as well, who keep stepping forward to grasp any issue that is thrown their way, give me hope. Whether it is illness, grief, the miserable bullies that we find, or just the daily challenges...work, homework, relationships, their direction in life. Each one of them meets each obstacle with integrity. They overcome and beat the odds at an alarming rate. It's comforting and fills me with wonder.
It would be very small of me to ignore the beauty of the people who have been given to me to love. If I was to say, it is just so hard, I can't continue, wouldn't I be a silly git? If I was to become jaded and throw up my hands and say, there's nothing I can do-that would be a lie.
So I choose. I choose to try. I choose to find a way to put aside my annoyances, my fears, my hurts. I choose to be welcoming, positive and gracious. Even when it hurts. Even when I would rather retreat. Even when I feel the deck is stacked and the odds unlikely.
What do I choose to believe? Nothing major. No giant world view. Just one small hope: That I can step forward and try.
